There are some days that really make me feel nostalgic for when I used to smoke and this was one of those days. It’s been seven, nearly eight years, since my last cigarette but this entire day — while I was trying to get to the office, while I was at the office, and while I was driving home from the office — I found myself thinking about how much easier it would all be if I had a cigarette. That’s strange for me because I didn’t really have any trouble quitting and it’s rare that I ever find myself wanting to start up again.
I think it’s the distraction. That was always the main appeal of smoking to me. It gave me something else to concentrate on whenever the real world was getting on my nerves. And today was one of those days. It was one of those days that left me counting every second until I could return home and think about something other than traffic and work. Back when I smoked, I knew down to the second how long it would take for me to get through one cigarette. I could tell how many minutes had passed by how many cigarettes I had smoked. I’m not saying that was a healthy habit but it was a satisfying way to pass the time without having to check my watch.
Don’t worry, I’m not planning on taking up smoking again. To many people were too happy when I quit for me to go back and disappoint all of them. I like having the extra money that would have otherwise gone to buying cigarettes. I like having the lung capacity that I wouldn’t have otherwise. I like not reeking of cigarette smoke. But just because I’m not planning on smoking again doesn’t mean that I don’t occasionally miss it.